[Personal]
[Personal me...] Have you ever had the feeling where- When you close your eyes really tight, you wish and wish and pray for the person you care so much for to appear- but when you open your eyes you feel so disapointed that they aren't there? [knowing they can't be.. Knowing how far.. Seeing the distance...'Yet still wanting and yearning so bad.] There's times i lay there at night.. Thinking about him- About what once was- About what once wasn't anymore- and about what can be- Neither of the three compare to the feeling i have when i close my eyes and imagine him there holding me close- that the breeze of the wind is his arms caressing my neck and body or embracing me ever so tightly. That when i start thinking and speaking the craziest thoughts that he won't be there anymore- he grips me tightly and shakes the insanity out of me- Allowing me to know and feel things will be okay- we would be okay- But will we ever truly be 'okay'? Our paths can cross many times- but when will the two paths become one and stay that way- when can i be there when can he be here? There are never any answers- and i can't ever hope there will be- because it only leads to reality- And reality is.. I can't make things happen that just won't. Just allow the thoughts to stay in my mind- allow him to sit on this cloud thats so high and far out of my reach- allow his lips to never touch mine, our hands to never meet, and his sweet embrace never to be felt. All that's left is a vision i hold- The vision that clouds my mind and fails to let me see that i still stand here alone. Pinky old embraces || and those || yet to come |
I loved on 03.08.03 at 10:00 pm |