Falling apart again- as my body fails to succeed and be strong [for once.]
Well alright- so i had a great time at basketball practice- It was so much fun. hahaha I almost made Mr.taylor fall because he said he can bet any$$ that he could get the rebound up against Me, edit, and veronica. Well it was everyone for themselves for the rebound. Juanita ended up making the shot. Dummie, haha- but i boxed coach taylor out and he almost fell LMAO We all cracked up. He said "MAN!!!" "I knew you were strong but i didn't know you were THAT strong-" lol We were laughing so hard. Cuz i sure showed him B-) hahah. But yeah then towards the end of practice he said again" You're stronger then i thought, we really NEED you to box out #35 when we play Northside Prep." I'm thinking- oh boy.. He's going to play me a lot. But oh well he's going to have me on her like a hound dog. lol
Alright well that was the good part of my day. I wasn't too excited about school. lol. On the way home after my mom picked me up from practice she almost started crying and tears filled her eyes- then she told me i have a Hernia in my tummy. :( She said it's partly why there's reflexes on my food- because my tummy gets too fool. And she said if i take a REALLY hard hit to the chest that the hernia could explode or bust my esophogus or whatever it's called. = That's what the x-rays i took a week ago showed. BLah! So not only that- i have to go through surgery for My tonsils, Adnoids (Ednoids?eh.), and the thing the divides my nose. Blah....... Rawr. I swear my body is crap. My spine is in pain- my chets hurts sometimes- because of the hernia- i can't breathe. I have severe Bronchitious- and i can't eat any food past 6 pm. I also have to chew every BIT of my food until its like mish mosh SOFT mish mosh. = So yeah. My body is failing me right now. I have to go through a lot of surgery(s) and get this shit fixed before one of these things have a long lasting affect. Oh the NOT joy of this pain. Blah. Sad part is i don't have any friends that are actually -there- for me. Ya know? I don't know. Everyone has their own agenda i guess. Kiddo's from school mainly worry about what college their getting into- or where they see themselves in 5 years- and worring about being successful. While i'm sitting here trying to take care of today and work on the physical disadvantages i have that could probably end my life if not taken care of properly. I dunno' REAL HONEST- friends are hard to find. So i guess i'll stick to my little box and being the sorta' 'out sider' until there's people i can really let my shell down around and be open with my feelings, and what i'm all about. So far no one has even attempted to know me. I mean REALLY know me. Not the tough me. Yeah. Cept for James maybe. (Speaking from people from school only.) James likes the 'Vanessa with the shell off' lol. He says my shell/wall is mean and tough and scares people including himself sometimes. lol What can ya' do? Alright well- That's all for now. I needed something to do for awhile to let my food digest a bit before i take a nap. So i decided to write. YAY haha. =) bye bye Sonic old embraces || and those || yet to come |
I loved on 01.06.03 at 5:54 pm |